ROMANIA ROMANIA PSILOCYBE
It has been suggested by an Australian physician that the general public in Australia, as well as members of its drug using subculture, first became aware of the visionary properties of these psychoactive mushrooms by a visiting surfer(s), who came from either New Zealand or the United States (Hawaii) and most likely provided ethnomycological information to local surfers (McCarthy, 1971). This physician reported that the use of psychoactive mushrooms, as well as 21 other drugs "was well demonstrated during a survey on drug abuse that was conducted in Southern Queensland during l969." This survey relied on interviews of 51 people belonging to "the `surfer' subculture local beach resorts". In this report, the doctor believed that "although the survey involved surfers and their female friends, there is no suggestion that the use of these drugs is confined to this group, which constitutes but a proportion of our (Australian) young drug taking community." It is thus likely that word-of-mouth communication made a significant contribution to the increasing use of "magic mushrooms" in Australia and NZ. a have been reported from
the following countries: Finland, Norway,
Sweden, Denmark, Germany, Switzerland,
Austria, The Netherlands, Belgium, France,
Russia, Poland, the former Czechoslovakia,
Hungary, Romania, Scotland, England, Wales,
Italy and Spain.
Unfortunately, there are no comprehensive
maps detailing the species's
distribution pattern. Traditionally, mycologists
have often neglected relatively tiny species, such
as Psilocybe semilanceata, that tend to share their
habitats with other, more prominent species. The
sarcastic phrase "The mushrooms occur in
abundance wherever mycologists abound" is
particularly pertinent in reference to the Psilocybe
species. Prior to the discovery of psilocybin, the
Psilocybe genus languished in the literature,
shrouded in obscurity. To this day, few
189. Psilocybe semilanceata Fr. Worthless]
The cap is uniformly conic to bell-shaped, with a pointy or obtuse center forming
an almost wart-like protrusion; initially, caps are often taller than they are wide, margins
are bent and curved inward; later on, width of cap is 1.5-4 cm. Hygrophanous; coloration
is a dirtyish olive-brown when wet, with translucent striate margins; at the center,
coloration is ocher or greenish-yellow against an overall shade of smudgy pale yellow and
oftentimes some greenish stains; only the margins are banded by a darkcolored, watery
stripe around the edge. No stripes or banding evident when mushrooms are completely
dried. Lacking a veil, caps are thin-fleshed, bald, with an easily separable pellicle that
remains gelatinous-sticky for a long time, turning shiny when dry.
Gills are olive brown to blackish purple brown in color, with the edges often
remaining white, gill spacing is quite crowded; gill attachment is either roughly linear or
mostly adnexed; up to 3.5 mm wide; attached at the stem only, fully detached later on.
Spores are elongated to ellipitical in shape, smooth and large, measuring 12-16 u
by 6-8,u. Color of spore dust is blackish purple brown.
Stem is very slender, almost uniformly thin and always twisted, 6-12 cm long and
1.25-2 mm thick, yellowish or whitish in color; areas subjected to pressure develop bluishgreen
stains. Stems are silky smooth and roughly at the center, cortinate fibrils appear like
remnants of a veil, which is brittle and lined with a white fibrous cord of wool-like
texture.
When dry, the flesh of the cap is colored pale yellow, while the stem's flesh is
ocher brown in color, especially towards the bottom. It is odorless and its flavor is mild.
The mushroom grows from August to October, frequently in gregarious clusters, and can
be found in pastures and along roadways, growing on dung that has undergone complete
decomposition. It is not a particularly rare species.
Figure 11(above) This excellent description of Psilocybe semilanceata by Michael & Schulz
(1927) is shown here as originally published in German, with an English translation.
Mycologists sp
The Mazatec Indians, who have a long tradition of using the mushrooms, inhabit a range of mountains called the Sierra Mazateca in the northeastern corner of the Mexican state of Oaxaca. The shamans in this essay are all natives of the town of Huautla de Jimenez. Properly speaking they are Huautecans; but since the language they speak has been called Mazatec and they have been referred to in the previous anthropological literature as Mazatecs, I have retained that name, though strictly speaking, Mazatecs are the inhabitants of the village of Mazatlan in the same mountains. ed
and large numbers of studies were conducted,
primarily with LSD. These investigators sought to
discover the receptor binding sites for
hallucinogenic compounds in the brain and to
understand the mechanisms underlying the
genesis of psychedelic visions. Today, we still
lack a sound theoretical framework able to
explain the relationship between chemical
compounds and the manifestation of their
psychoactivity. Even though basic research is
certainly important, its methods, unfortunately, are
often a function of a rather one-sided
pharmacological approach to investigating the
effects of psilocybin, LSD and mescaline - an
approach that is, in fact, too narrow to address the
remarkably unusual nature of these substances and
their effects.
Misunderstandings between pharmacologists
and toxicologists on the one hand and
psychiatrists and psychologists on the other can
often be traced all the way back to the 1950's,
creating a legacy of disputes and arguments that
have yet to be resolved. S. Grof undertook the
tedious task of analyzing 5,000 experimental LSD
protocols in an effort to isolate "absolute"
symptoms that are reported or occur all of the
time. His results were negative. According to Grof,
hallucinogenic substances are non-specific triggers
causing a sequence of altered states of
consciousness, which do not fit the syndrome
labeled "toxic psychosis". Rather, it is the
individual's personality, along with the
experimental setting that significantly shape the
nature of the psychedelic experience. This view is
shared by a majority of experts with considerable
experience in conducting psychedelics-assisted
psychotherapy. Even "real" somatic symptoms,
such as nausea or vomiting, can often be controlled
through psychological intervention techniques
administered by trained professionals.
A Plethora of Names
The broad range of possible experiences
inspired the use of labels other than
"hallucinogens", with widely differing semantic
connotations: entheogens, psychedelics,
illusionogens, psycholytics, psychomimetics,
psychodysleptica, psychoemetics and others.
"Phantastica" (Lewin) is the oldest label
ever used to describe this class of substances. This
term successfully evokes dream-like, fanciful
aspects of the experience, as well as the potential
for euphoric and dysphoric emotional overtones.
More recent terminology often says more about
semantic biases of those who use the labels than
about any factual, objective characteristics of the
alkaloids they refer to. Accordingly, official antidrug
propaganda since
the 1960's has disparaged "psychedelics" as
excessively glamorous and too positive a label, as
the term was popular among Timothy Leary's fans
and supporters.
When used in low doses or for the first
time, these substances are most likely to bring
about a kind of magical transformation of
surroundings, with a heightened ability to perceive
subtle differences along the color spectru
brown mushroom on cow dung in new mexico
ulinary
mushroom bears no
resemblance, either in size or form, to Inocybe
aeruginascens. Overall, however, these
unfortunate cases have also contributed to our
understanding of mushroom biochemistry.
In this context, I want to emphasize
once more that the hallucinogenic varieties
among the Inocybes can easily be mistaken for
those muscarine-producing Inocybe species
that are extremely poisonous.
As part of his investigation of the
Psilocybe genus, Guzman noted a common
trait among the hallucinogenic species, in
addition to the bluing reaction: a flour-like
smell or taste. Apart from the inherent
subjective nature of our sense of smell and
taste, a common odor is a trait that definitely
does not apply to the European species (also
see Chapter 3.
2).
Mycophile or Mycophobe?
There are reports from the Western
United States about people with expert
knowledge of Psilocybe semilanceata -
devoted mushroom hunters who can identify
the species with drill and accuracy.
At the
same time, however, these experts cannot
identify easily spotted common table
mushrooms, nor are they able to differentiate
the Agaricus species (champignons) from other
mushrooms, even when these species grow on
the same pasture. Such individuals, then, are
not interested in Romania Psilocybe Semilanceata species other than Psilocybe
semilanceata. In my opinion, this attitude
reflects a rare combination of mycophilia and
mycophobia.
A mushroom's spore dust provides
important information needed to determine
identity. A spore print is left by the gills when
the cap is placed on black or white paper
(depending on spore color). As the process
takes several hours, a glass vessel must be
placed over the cap to prevent drying. While
useful, information obtained from spore
analyses has its limitations, For instance,
spores derived from mushrooms belonging to
different genera may have the same color, but
reveal basic differences under the microscope.
There is also a high degree of similarity among
spores from different Psilocybe species. Thus,
the only way to prevent grave errors and
potentially deadly intoxications is to rely on
experienced experts for mushroom
identification, a process that must include
analysis of available ecological data.
CHAPTER 5
THE BLUING PHENOMENON AND METOL
TESTING: REALITY VS. WISHFUL THINKING
As previously discussed in Chapters 3.1
and 3.7, the bluing reaction is characteristic
of species that produce psilocybin. Still, for
unknown reasons, some species or samples
belonging to a genus that usually turns blue
may not always change color, regardless of
psilocybin content. Among the species that I
have examined, Psilocybe bohemica
displayed the most impressive bluing
reaction. The caps of this species stain very
quickly in reaction to pressure. Other species,
such as Psilocybe cubensis (Earle) Sing.
have stems that develop very intensely blue
stains, while their caps do not exhibit the
bluing reaction.
By contrast, Psilocybe
own cause of death and disease,
psilocybin cyan habitat
bloated stomachs and insanity. Beliefs such as these have survived to the present day. They persist, for example,,, as figures of speech, s u c h as the slick Austrian description of a societal misfit as someone "who ate those madness-inducing mushrooms." But, there is another, very different, magic mushroom legacy as well. Flesh of the Gods for Devil Worshippers The Old World. Mycenaean civilization began with a mushroom trip -Mushrooms were an ingredient in the ambrosia of Dionysus. Porphyrius, the fourth century Latin poet and contemporary of Emperor Konstantin, knew that magic mushrooms were the children of the gods. WHO WAS THE FIRST MAGICIAN? A quasi-cannibalistic ritual, the act of eating the children of the gods unlocked one's power to experience the truly divine. But not all mushrooms enable human beings to enter Things To Do On Shrooms the realm of divine consciousness. This magic power resides in only those fungi known as "fool's mushrooms", which were considered poisonous and believed to be the spawn of the Devil throughout the late Middle Ages and well into modern times. The New World: The Aztecs in Mexico referred to a number of small, inconspicuous mushrooms as teonartacatl, or "flesh of the Gods." These sacred mushrooms were eaten during the course psilocybin cyan habitat of rituals intended to contact the Gods in order to learn about the world and the realm of the divine. These magic mushroom rituals thoroughly spooked the Catholic Spaniards. The mushroom eaters, commonly thought of as Devil worshippers, were hounded by the Inquisition. Still, all good things survive the tests of time, so the cult of magic mushroom eaters did not become extinct. Like mycelia underground, the cult continued to flourish, and at the proper time in recorded history, in 1957, the fruit of the fully grown mushroom re-surfaced to draw widespread public attention. Valentine and Gordon Wasson became the heroes of the modern neo-mycophilic movement. Back to the Old World: The revelations and insights gained from the use of psychoactive mushrooms were so magically wonderful, that our native European "fool's mushrooms" - psilocybin cyan habitat which were gene ; considered inedible - had to be recognized as closely related to the magic mushrooms of Mexico, the flesh of the Aztec Gods. The souls of magic mushrooms in Mexico and Germany are essentially made from the same substance: psilocybin.Jochen Gartz has made an extraordinary contribution to the field of mycology by embracing Germany's magic mushrooms and the scientific study and testing of these fungi. The research efforts upon which this book is based require nothing less than a fearless, brave and courageous consciousness, free of prejudice and mycophobia. I am convinced that a researcher's consciousness infused by the spirit of the magic mushroom is capable of far deeper scientific insights than we can ever expect from the usual ivory tower academics, isolated from reality More than half of Australia's beef cattle can be found in the coastal areas of Queensland and New South Wales; and the 20 to 30 inch (500-750mm) rainfall belt of Queensland, New South Wales and Northern Victoria, generally provide adequate climatic environments for the growth of psilocybian mushrooms, especially after heavy rains. It has been suggested that "Psilocybe cubensis was introduced into Australia accidentally by early settlers along with their livestock." This same spore dispersal mechanism also probably applies to Copelandia cyanescens, Panaeolus subbalteatus and several additional species known to occur in or around the dung of other ruminants. This includes Psilocybe semilanceata and the non-hallucinogenic "haymaker's" mushroom Panaeolina foenisecii. While cattle are raised in all Australian states, as well as in the central lowlands, recreational users have been known to export these psychoptic species to various areas in Australia from areas where they were collected. In the case of New Zealand, hereafter referred to as NZ, cattle are the primary source for Copelandia cyanescens, but the "liberty cap" mushroom Psilocybe semilanceata only grows in the manured soil of four-legged ruminants and not directly from manure (Jansen, Pers. Comm., 1988). The identification section of this guide documents reported locations for more than 1 dozen species of psilocybian mushrooms in Australia and NZ which most likely have been used at one time or another for recreational purposes. In addition, many early users of "magic mushrooms" in Australia may have first become aware of their mind-altering and visionary effects by reading the published literature or the many news items appearing in the popular Australian press during the late l960's and early l970's. These news items often described both accidental and deliberate intoxication's which resulted from the ingestion of several varieties of "magic mushrooms". For example, in 1972, one local newspaper report provided an account regarding the use of these mushrooms by young teenagers at a local high school in Brisbane: "...children at a suburban school are getting high on mushrooms called 'Gold Tops.' The mushrooms are common along the Brisbane River near Toowing High School, and children in search of `kicks' have been experimenting with them (Unsigned, 1972)." It would be very obvious to anyone who read this above mentioned news item, when it appeared in print, that those searching for hallucinogenic mushrooms would be able to find them if they so desired. There is yet another factor that may have played a significant role in promoting interest in the use of psychoactive mushrooms in Australia and NZ. Some drug users or mycophillic individuals may have read or heard of R. Gordon Wasson's personal account of his adventurous rediscovery of an hallucinogenic mushroom cult among the Mazatec Indians of Southern Mexico. Dr. Wasson reported the ceremonial use of certain mushrooms as divinatory substances among the Mazatecs and other native peoples in Oaxaca, Mexico (see Wasson, 1957). This journalistic report of Wasson's research expedition appeared in an international edition of Life Magazine in the late l950's, providing many drug users and others with the incentive to seek out, find, and eventually experiment with these mushrooms.
. For
that reason, freeze-dried samples for biochemical
analysis are stored at -10°C prior to alkaloid
extractions or chromatography testing. In addition
to the reports from Finland, investigators in North
America have noted that psilocybin's decay rate is
slowest in Psilocybe semilanceata, compared to
other species.
(1) R = H2P03
(2) R = H
Figure 19 - Structural formulas for
psilocybin (1) and psilocin (2).
CH3
CH3
Psilocybe semilanceata
Figure 20 - Distribution pattern of Psilocybe semilanceata in Germany and adjacent areas.
Locations are indicated by black
NM mushroom identification dots.
CHAPTER 3.
2
PSILOCYBE CYANESCENS - POTENT MUSHROOMS
GROWING ON WOOD DEBRIS
At least one other Psilocybe species in
addition to Psilocybe semilanceata is known to
exist in Europe. At this point, I must emphasize
that the differentiation of single species within
the Psilocybe genus is subject to considerable
controversy among eminent taxonomists. For
example, there are different methods of
distinguishing the Hypholoma genus from the
Stropharia genus.
The Widespread Distribution
of Psilocybe cyanescens
While Psilocybe semilanceata is a species
that has long been clearly defined and is well
known by this name, there are, according to
Krieglsteiner, other strongly bluing mushrooms
that can be described as belonging to the
"Psilocybe cyanescens complex". These are all
mushrooms that grow on raw compost and plant
debris.
In accordance with current states of
knowledge, the following names in the literature
are merely synonyms for Psilocybe cyanescens
Wakefield emend. Krieglsteiner:
different herbariums. However, the microscopic
data pertaining to the Psilocybe species are poorly
delineated and oftentimes overlap. It is therefore
imperative that additional mycological studies of
Psilocybe cyanescens be performed. To this end,
fresh mushroom samples from various
Magic Mushrooms Identification Nm European
locations should be used, and biochemical methods
must be included in the investigation. Guzman's
division of Psilocybe cyanescens by geographic
area, however, definitely turned out to be
inaccurate. According to Gymnopilusspgrowinwood his system, -North Africa
was home to Psilocybe mairei, while Psilocybe
cyanescens were found in England and Holland and
Psilocybe serbica supposedly grew in Serbia and
Bohemia. Gymnopilusspidentification The geographic distribution of the entire
species seems to cover a vast area, with
NM mushroom identification variations
along climate and terrain at locations where samples
were collected. Such disparate morphologies are to
be expected when dealing with "young" species,
that is, species that have not yet firmly established
themselves and are still expanding into new
locations.
Figure 7 (p. 14) displays locations in
Europe and North Africa where samples of
Psilocybe cyanescens have been found.
- Hypholoma cyanescens R. Maire
- Hypholoma coprinifacies (Rolland ss.
Herink) Pouzar
- Geophila cyanescens (R. Maire) Kuhner &
Romagnesi
- Psilocybe serbica Moser & Horak
- Psilocybe mairei Singer
- Psilocyb
mushrooms identification magic mushrooms
Psychotherapy 108 10.
Outlook 114 11. Bibliography 120 Index 129 Figure 2 - Psilocybe cubensis from Australia Figure 3 - Water color painting of Panaeolus subbalteatus (Germany, 1927).
Figure 4 - Fresh Panaeolus subbalteatus mushrooms.
FOREWORD Nobody knows precisely when the first magic mushroom emerged from the shadows of prehistory to enter the light of consciousness. Nobody knows when the first magic mushroom was eaten by a human being. Nobody knows just who the first magic mushroom eater was. In seeking answers to these questions, we can only speculate. Mycophobes, however, are quick to voice their conviction that only a fool would be reckless enough to want to attain a higher state of consciousness beyond the boundaries of everyday reality. And only a fool would attempt to do this by ingesting those odd little things that mysteriously thrive on decaying, humid soil, rotten wood and malodorous mounds of cow manure. Historically, magic, mushrooms have been feared and hated` since antiquity: magic mushrooms were thought to be made from poisons that had dripped from serpents' fangs; they were considered to be unclean emissions of evil spirits; moreover, mushrooms were a kn
Her first experiment, with Psilocybe cubensis, had already introduced her to the realm of mystical experiences. For her second journey, she used 20 Psilocybe semilanceata mushrooms as part of a group ritual and achieved transcendence. A remarkable feature of her account is that the presence of an experienced guide was needed to realize the full potential of this visionary quest. "1 sat down next to another participant, seeking to connect with others in preparation for my journey. We proceeded to eat the fresh mushrooms. The room grew quiet and lovely music began to play. The mushrooms's effects came on much faster than they did during my first experiment. Twice I tried to establish closer contact with my fellow participant, but he was very nervous, and no source of reassurance for me.
I was seeking my spiritual companion, but did not find that person among the present group. I became a figure in a long, white robe, wandering aimlessly among the columns (Greece?), still searching. My gaze lingered briefly on the wall next to the door and I saw faces and figures appear and vanish, but they did not hold my interest. It was hopeless. I continued my aimless roaming, and I was on the material plane, which I wanted to leave - had to leave. Suddenly, I found myself with one of the guides, who wanted to help me. I stared off into the distance, longing to be free of the material plane, but unable to do so. For a long time, I failed to connect with the guide; our two worlds were just too different. Suddenly I sensed that he wasn't able to look at me directly. The path by which to reach me runs through my eyes, because only they are truly alive. I asked him to help me on my way and invited him to look into my eyes. I felt as if all life energy was draining from my bo More than half of Australia's beef cattle can be found in the coastal areas of Queensland and New South Wales; and the 20 to 30 inch (500-750mm) rainfall belt of Queensland, New South Wales and Northern Victoria, generally provide adequate climatic environments for the growth of psilocybian mushrooms, especially after heavy rains. It has been suggested that "Psilocybe cubensis was introduced into Australia accidentally by early settlers along with their livestock." This same spore dispersal mechanism also probably applies to Copelandia cyanescens, Panaeolus subbalteatus and several additional species known to occur in or around the dung of other ruminants. This includes Psilocybe semilanceata and the non-hallucinogenic "haymaker's" mushroom Panaeolina foenisecii. While cattle are raised in all Australian states, as well as in the central lowlands, recreational users have been known to export these psychoptic species to various areas in Australia from areas where they were collected. In the case of New Zealand, hereafter referred to as NZ, cattle are the primary source for Copelandia cyanescens, but the "liberty cap" mushroom Psilocybe semilanceata only grows in the manured soil of four-legged ruminants and not directly from manure (Jansen, Pers. Comm., 1988). The identification section of this guide documents reported locations for more than 1 dozen species of psilocybian mushrooms in Australia and NZ which most likely have been used at one time or another for recreational purposes. went in waves. Increasingly, all colors in her immediate surroundings coalesced into shades of green. The hallucinations were fearsome; the heads of monsters became visible and a wall opened up into an abyss. There was a succession of human figure with animal heads. The next day, everything was back to normal. The oldest child (age 14) also saw her parents' hair color turn green, had dilated pupils and watched geometric shapes appear on the wall. The youngest child (age 11) experienced cramps and lost consciousness. In 1960, Singer and Guzman suggested that Panaeolus cyanescens might contain psilocybin, because of the intense blue staining they had observed. It wasn't until after the intoxications in Menton had been publicized, that a research team working with A. Hofmann detected 0.2% of psilocybin in the mushrooms. Considering the powerful effects, however, this concentration appears to be too low to cause such impressive reactions. Later on, Sandoz Laboratories reported the level of psilocybin in dried samples as 0.8%, along with 1.2% psilocin. The level of psilocin, however, may have been falsely elevated by the presence of serotonin and its derivates in the mushroom sample that was being tested. According to Stijve, a mushroom sample collected by J.W. Allen in Thailand contained 0.4% - 1.05% of psilocin, with only trace amounts of psilocybin; serotonin was present in large amounts, comparable to concentrations found in all Panaeolus species. Apparently, Panaeolus cyanescens produces more psilocin than psilocybin. Still, I was able to detect 0.4% of psilocybin in mycelia cultivated on malt agar, with no other indole compounds present. Discussion of the Panaeolus species would remain incomplete without pointing out that those subjectively terrifying psychoses reported in 1965 cannot be attributed to a specific mushroom ingredient, but were likely precipitated by the circumstances (set and setting) surrounding the incident. The effects described by J. Allen in Hawaii after eating 20 specimens paint a different picture altogether: With radio music playing softly in the dark, euphoria began to come on in waves. After 20 minutes, visions became so intense that I tried to close my eyes. Whenever 1 did close my eyes, my eyelids felt as if they were being sprayed from the outside. Colors were sharp and clear, but I always quickly opened my eyes again. Colors were dancing like laser beams to the rhythm of the music. The stars in the sky assembled in clusters that reached all the way into my soul. I was a little scared at the idea that the ocean water might rush up all the way into our hut. Other than that, feelings of euphoria were overwhelming. At times, I was overcome by fits of laughter. That night, I slept like "a prince ". The following morning I gathered up my belongings and had to walk back across the pasture where I had collected the mushrooms the day before. I noticed a lot o Most recreational users of Psilocybe cubensis (when grown in vitro) require a dosage of
n the U.S.)
contribute to the therapeutic process; they may
even be the sole source for future progress.
Under these conditions, stereo music also
significantly deepened the intensity of the
experience. It appears that these kinds of specific
experiences may also account for the remarkable
success of treating terminal patients with LSD to
ease their fears in the face of death and to reduce
even the most severe forms of pain. In many such
cases, symptoms disappeared entirely, and relief
from pain and anxiety that continued even after the
drug's acute effects had worn off. A book by S.
Grof provides a compassionate analysis of such
successful treatments, which serves to underscore
the fact that systematic efforts to investigate these
particular therapeutic benefits have only just
begun. So far, LSD has been the most Psilocybe Semilanceata Romania widely
studied substance in terms of Shrooms Spore easing the suffering
of terminally ill patients, as well as dipropyltryptamine
(DPT), a synthetic drug structurally
similar to psilocybin that is active only when
administered by injection.
Below, a young woman from Switzerland
gives a detailed account of her second mushroom
experience. Her first experiment, with Psilocybe
cubensis, had already introduced her to the realm
of mystical experiences. For her second journey,
she used 20 Psilocybe semilanceata mushrooms as
part of a group ritual and achieved transcendence.
A remarkable feature of her
account is that the presence of an experienced
guide was needed to realize the full potential of
this visionary quest.
"1 sat down next to another participant,
seeking to connect with others in preparation for
my journey. We proceeded to eat the fresh
mushrooms. The room grew quiet and lovely
music began to play. The mushrooms's effects
came on much faster than they did during my first
experiment. Twice I tried to establish closer
contact with my fellow participant, but he was
very nervous, and no source of reassurance for
me. I was seeking my spiritual companion, but did
not find that person among the present group. I
became a figure in a long, white robe, wandering
aimlessly among the columns (Greece?), still
searching.
My gaze lingered briefly on the wall next
to the door and I saw faces and figures appear
and vanish, but they did not hold my interest. It
was hopeless.
I continued my aimless roaming,
and I was on the material plane, which I wanted
to leave - had to leave. Suddenly, I found myself
with one of the guides, who wanted to help me. I
stared off into the distance, longing to be free of
the material plane, but unable to do so. For a long
time, I failed to connect with the guide; our two
worlds were just too different. Suddenly I sensed
that he wasn't able to look at me directly. The path
by which to reach me runs through my eyes,
because only they are truly alive. I asked
him to help me on my way and invited him to look
into my eyes. I felt as if all life energy was
draining from my bo